Concordia

Concordia Winter 2023

35

My own reports are gathering layers of dust in the attic, but I know they're there, and material for grandchildren to laugh at. There are reports from primary school, on single sheets of A4, with blunt comments (“works well”, “good work”) and boxes ticked. There are secondary school reports too, booklets with a page for each subject. I know perfectly well what they say. One maths report from Year 9, written in enormous capitals, says only “GETS THERE...”, and over the page, “JUST!!”. There's an embarrassing Geography report from Jumbo Jones in Year 7 which puts me top of the class for term work, and bottom (29th) for the end-of-term exam. I didn't realise you had to learn all that stuff about boring Cormish China Clay. There's a Year 10 History report which says “He entertained us all with his analysis of the Daily Mirror , but must

learn that left-wing politicians are socialists rather than socialites”. And there is a caustic and rather Victorian comment from my Year 10 Latin teacher: “He has written, on the first page of his exercise book, the words "Morituri te salutemus". I am not amused.” Jon’s ability to read and proof every report and write a summative comment displaying a rounded knowledge of each boy was the stuff of legend; an impossible act to follow. Nevertheless, Stephen Wright took on the task and ‘softened’ reports. The introduction of electronic reporting was a mixed blessing with typos to correct, alongside copious amounts of copy, and regular requests not to copy and paste. Chris Roseblade saw the potential for creating unique and memorable prose about his charges and we asked him for his reflections.